In the Desert, a Mountain of Snow Arose to the Occasion

It was a day that for centuries has been designated for the coming of the final prophet.  And through a manner of traditionalism, the inhabitants of the land grew weary of men who they thought, thought too much.  These men (who disagreed with ancient teachings and kept to themselves, befriending bowls of fruit and apparently meaningless yet homemade for the sake of the dying art, matching salt and pepper shakers), were put to death for fear that they'll find the prophet stories to be in fact true, and become insane far more so than already believed.  And so the crowd gathered at the destination of the prophet's arrival (the corner of 3rd ave. and East Center st.) and waited. Finally, in a flash of light, that of the like has not been seen since an Egyptian pharaoh kissed a frog whose skin was poisonous with the most hallucinogenic substance ever invented by which the event actually created the universe, the prophet emerged.  She was indeed surprised to see that there we're still inhabitants on this land. As she walked ahead, parting the sea of gawking spectators, a roar of questions blasted forth.  "What is life?", one inquired, "How is Elvis?", another screamed.  Eventually she heard the only question that could truely be answered.  "Why have you come?"  She raised her hands to capture the crowd's complete attention, cleared her throat, and began to speak. "I am saddened, for my coming has now of no significance. Thank you people of this land." With that said, she turned and disappeared in not quite such a spectacle as her arrival, for she was most depressed and figured the people didn't deserve such patronage anyway.  The only meaning for her arrival was to complete the most ultimate collection, known or unknown to anyone, of matching salt and pepper shakers. Written December 4th, 2001 © on Apr 13 2002 08:50 AM PST   10 • 0 • 14