Understanding memories

If things were going great than why did they end? you said that you were happy I'm confused by this why say something as positive as that when only feeling the opisite You say that things are going to be okay yet I can't help to feel abandoned fuck you you said that you would never do this that you cared for me that you loved me All lies and faire tales I hope that your happy now Something that I can not be Now I question everything I've said and done for the past year Wondering where to go now? What should I replace you with? anger hate bitterness I Tried to help you through times of pain into times of pleasure This is how you repay me? through feelings of lonliness and confusion I still love you and care for you To keep the void in my soul from swallowing me I always did hate to be alone People who once called you friend Now call you slut and whore you say that none of this bothers you and that your much happier now Yet their words will stay with you always you could have avoided it all by being true to yourself By not leading me to conclusions, so that you can feel normal by letting your true colours show Why did you ask me that day? why did I say yes Yet just like snow in winter You came and erased, all the other colours in my world you sufficate the life out of me should I thank you for that I'm getting over getting used to this I never thought we would have ever come to this this was never what you wanted from me, or how you meant it to be I know that nowI wrote this after waking up from a concert last night. Because I realized something. If I continue just to be angry in my state of confusion then I will never get over her or the situation. Its okay for me to be angry. Its part of the process of getting over some one. I was too afraid to do that before. Now that I have though things feel better then they did two days ago. I feel like their is hope now Written December 17th, 2001 © on Dec 16 2001 03:51 PM PST   18 • 0 • 12