Funny Ways to Die

It was a typical day on earth.  One sixteen-year old anorexic was killed by a grocery truck after 10 days of self-starvation. One chronic depressive who desired death passionately, was cured.  At midnight, he was murdered by a madman. A dutiful wife who quiety yearned to travel, spent the last day of her life in the town where she was born, married to a husband who complained about her staidness at the funeral. An artist who went blind learned how to weave baskets that no one wanted. A writer contracted alzheimer's disease the year before the Muse would appear with THE IDEA. A pianist in Yugoslavia became profoundly deaf and killed himself. (The cure was discovered the following day in Poland.) An Audience at the circus stopped laughing at the clown. An audience at the lecture hall started laughing at the philosopher. A dog who had perfected unconditional love, got sold to a research lab: Row 3, Cage 10, Room 7, for terminal experiment. Almost everywhere, the sun rose shining out of a blue sky.  It was 76 degrees.  A tropical breeze blew from dawn to dark. Toward evening a baby was born with one heart and two heads.  Lightning struck the cafeteria downstairs. It did no damage.This funny, funny world we live in provides funny, funny ways to expire.  Here are a few. Written January 17th, 2002 © on Jan 17 2002 01:04 AM PST, Carole Dudley   0 • 7