The Hobbit/Elf is Hotter

Disclaimer: The elf and hobbit belong to JRR Tolkein. The song “The Boy is Mine” belongs to Brandy and Monica.  The Potions Mistress is me, Wanda is Starburst.  ~The Hobbit/Elf is hotter~ The Potions Mistress: Excuse me can I talk to you for a minute? Wanda: Uh hum, sure. Hey, I know you. TPM: Yeah I know you too but umm I just wanted to know, do you know the hobbit named… you know his name. W: Oh yeah. I definitely know his name. TPM: I just wanted to let you know he’s hotter. W: Huh… no no, the elf’s hotter. [Chorus] TPM: You need to give it up. Had about enough. It’s not hard to see, The hobbit is hotter. W: I’m sorry that you, Seem to be confused. Fine he’ll never be. The elf is hotter. TPM: I think it’s time we got this straight. Let’s sit and talk face to face. There is no way you could mistake, Legolas for hottest- are you insane? W: See I know Frodo may be, Just a bit jealous of he, But you’re just blind if you can’t see, That the elf is a hottie. TPM: You see I tried to hesitate. I didn’t wanna say what he told me. He said his hair was all fake. It’s just a wig. Ain’t that a shame. W: Maybe I misunderstood, ‘Cuz I can’t see how you could, Wanna screw Elijah Wood, When my elf is so damn good. TPM: You need to give it up. Had about enough. It’s not hard to see, The hobbit is hotter. W: I’m sorry that you, Seem to be confused. Fine he’ll never be. The elf is hotter. W: Must you think the way you do? Keep on acting like a fool. You know ‘Lij is nothing compared to, My adorable Bloom. TPM: I think that you should realize, And stare into his lovely eyes. He has the power to hypnotize. I know it’s killing you inside. W: You can say what you want to say. What he has Elijah can’t take, From the truth you can’t escape, Your boy’s eyes are so fake. TPM: When will you get the picture? You and the elf have no future. I don’t know why you even bother, And if you didn’t know, the hobbit’s hotter. TPM: You need to give it up. Had about enough. It’s not hard to see, The hobbit is hotter. W: I’m sorry that you, Seem to be confused. Fine he’ll never be. The elf is hotter. Written March 12th, 2002 © on Mar 12 2002 07:00 AM PST   20 • 0 • 14