Life (The Way It Is and Shouldn't Be)

If you want anything just scream, And if I dont answer I must be dead, In the sense that I have a unworking brain, like a unshined marble waiting to be touched and used again. With a bump on my head I lay on the floor wondering why, I worried about that girl, Last nite, in that bar fight, It makes you wonder what happens when, Your puny little mind jumps into overdrive, At the sight of a innocent victum, And there is nothing you can do, So you try as you might, But your not strong enough, As your pain lesses to a sound, Like a voice in the back of your head that makes you go mad, With anger as you wana get back what you once had. With my head hanging outa the shower stall with a rope around my neck, I wondering what happend to me, And if i wasnt such a chicken shit, Using that knife in the first place, I wouldnt be in the shit fucked up mess that I am in, And never could be if I only listened to what you said, I wouldnt be feeling the way I have been, Since the first day I met you, I am one messed up child in a adult male body, Standing there driping wet and cold pondering, On what could and should have been, Like it was back then, Of all the fun times with that special someone, Even if it was so short, It was the best time, To me.First poem i ever wrote in my life. Written November 17th, 2000 © on Nov 09 2001 09:51 PM PST   18 • 0 • 1