Monologue

Outside it may appear that I have the strength of a thousand men I hold my head up with dignity I speak poetically I may intrigue many I have survived the wrath of a childhood scorned Tell me, can you hear my heart cry out? Why won’t you try to get inside my head? Is it so easy to ignore me…I haven’t said all there is for me to say? I whisper only to the dark the answers to questions I long to have asked Let me be weak…or are you scared to hold me? I want to loose composure isn’t that all right? Show me that you know that what I show to the world isn’t in my soul Only a few of you know A once naïve little girl is trembling being led out alone No one wants to know the real me I am the anchor for the seas of those who attempt to hold my hand For an instant may I bow my head in fear? Won’t you kiss me? Look into my eyes I need you to heal me The tears flow into the ocean of the force that fights against me Who will weather the storm and see me in my lonely hour? I’m bleeding…fighting…losing I own only what you can’t see Inside is too ugly Scar tissue left unhealed without anyone to touch me I’m fading away because love doesn’t exist within my earnest pride I am my own angel my own enemy My greatest achievement my gravest disappointment A storm cloud whose sunny smiles brighten all that is false within this world of terror Please don’t scoff at me, patronize, and pity me Outside I sing the song of victory Of vigor and consistency Within the bounds of reality, fantasy has forsaken me I vomit mirror imaging I’ve said too much now I must go The stage is set to take my bowThis is my truth and my imagination forging a quiet battle through the center of my pen. Written October 18th, 2001 © on Mar 16 2002 08:35 AM PST   0 • 1