Paper Doll

Paper Doll paper doll in a pretty dress this isn't reality so do your best everyday you're so intent checking for folds, hoping for dents perfection is a deadly game what wrong with keeping your secret shame? a battle fought against each counterpart only focusing on flesh while ignoring your heart plastic article of loss and decay listening to what the wrong one's say you see a world that can be all yours full of deathly mirages and fashion whores they walk down the runway so sleek and pretty hard to recognize inner torment and misery still it's all you think about creating your own truth helps rid the doubt every bite cause guilt and sorrow tell yourself you'll eat nothing tomorrow such large quantities of mass appeal makes it hard to know how you really feel each day your reflection implodes occasional highs falling to lows pretty paper doll so thin frail and weak from guilt and sin beauty is the magic word tainted smile, not self-assured protruding bones, stomach concave you dig yourself an early grave hiding under baggy clothes concealing your victory so no one knows eyes bugging out of a face so hollow no other alternative example to follow takes too much energy just to laugh but it's the happiness once craved you now completely lack you curl up into a tiny ball can't stop all the tears that fall paper doll cut-out of shame jagged edges torn and frayed deadly template of withered flesh matching self-hatred and joy don't mesh living with a dirty little secret it's no surprise you'll always want to keep it -written at 6:40 AM, Jan 28, 2002-I guess this is kinda self-explanitory. When I started writing this it was meant as sort of an ode to ana, but it turned out to be almost like a warning against it.... Written January 29th, 2002 © on Jan 29 2002 11:10 AM PST   18 • 0 • 1