Alcoholic recount

Quick! Drink, Don't think My mouth is a sink; a drain, for liquor straight to my brain, slicker, make me drink quicker Vodka, wine friends of mine. They are white, no smell and soon you'll be mine. Lips form words, quite thick: "gimme another, quick..." Booze, oozing through my veins, Booze, spreading to my brain Insane with drink, warm, don't let me think again. Seductively, giving me  false security from the  boring tedious, reality escapism. Look at me! I'm ten feet tall! Whoops :} did I just fall? I wanna dance, romance, take a chance. All of a sudden it goes blank _____________ wake up naked on my back Oh my god! am I nude? Oh my god! who is that dude? Laugh, yes, piece it together yes I know that fella There are my clothes all over the floor yes, that is my bra I just saw... Never fear I'm intact despite the fact my memory I lack and the fact I'm laying on my back in some man's bed and cotton wool is in my head, No harm's done I've been here before. It's not so bad when there is no recall. Never fear, It's become quite clear I picked you up because you were near. Where I was when I was drunk never mind because I was drunk, intoxicated with the drink, medicated, I didn't think. It's no big deal All I wanted was to feel. Start Act I: Pretend to know what I have done. Start Act II: Pretend I know what to do. Look at me, I'm doing fine, I am in charge of my mind. (My hands are shakin', please don't notice) "Look at your hands." "Yes I know." "Would you like a drink?" "Yes, please, a cup of tea." (My god, at least I had good taste for once.) (I need to pee...) Look at my hair! I stare in the mirror with full horror. Go back, stop all acts. (dialogue) "What happened?" A pause for all eternity... “You picked me up” “What did I say?” “You said, “you are so good looking, you should be in the movies” “What else, please, tell me for my own personal growth.” “You said, “kiss me, so I can tell if you are good in bed” “My god! Did I really say that?” “Yes, and it worked.” But my mind says You took me home Memories say we were walking your way. You say I am a bad girl Are you a bad boy? You say I have a drinking problem I say “yes, it is in the blood.” You play your guitar when I come back from the toilet Singing “ice queen, Melt the ice queen.” You say “It seems appropriate.” I am pleading You are kneeding My back. Where is my memory? Look – it’s not that scary, Especially with A warm body And a chest quite hairy. An affectionate man With caring hands Who has no idea My mind wasn’t clear An intelligent man Who was also boozy Don’t blame me! He is also a floosy. The inspection begins, Curiousity aroused, Handsome face; Handsome hands. Still hazy, Feelin’ lazy, Don’t want to get out of bed. OUCH! There goes my head… Time to leave Time to fly Want something more But feeling weary Starting to get teary Bit hard When breakin’ rules We all learnt in school What a fool. Somethin’ you just can’t get over Blown chances ends romances Can’t move on Three weeks on Still waitin’ By the phone Why did you Have to ask For my damn number I knew you wouldn’t call Just your conscience talkin’ I said “It’s no big deal…” Anyway thank you For showing courtesy Despite the facts Of  reality. A paper hero For a fallen lady Who lost her manners And acted shady. Apples and tea Sit well with me Pretendin’ we aren’t hungover Is really sweet. Everything I asked for A learned man Who reads books A good looking man Who is kind To show me There is hope Despite the fact I was inebriated And didn’t appreciate it. Written November 30th, 2001 © on Nov 29 2001 08:50 PM PST   18 • 1 • 14