Useful Expressions for Those High Stress Days (a non-poem)

the last three are designed specifically for a work siuation only, but the rest CAN and WILL be used in other places... 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit. 2. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a fuck. 3. How about "never"? Is "never" good for you? 4. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying. 5. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 6. Ahhh, I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again. 7. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 8. I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth. 9. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. 10. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject. 11. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. 12. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 13. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. 14. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid. 15. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!? 16. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant. 17. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 18. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off. 19. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial. 20. No, my powers can only be used for good. 21. I'm really easy to get along with once you learn to worship me. 22. You sound reasonable......time to up my medication. 23. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 24. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 25. I don't work here. I'm a consultant. 26. Who me? I just wander from room to room. 27. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!yay! yet more crazy, wonderful, and kooky things i do when bored (or completey stuck on actual poetry) Written January 31st, 2002 © on Jan 31 2002 06:02 AM PST   0 • 14