Kelly of the Legion

Now Kelly was no fighter;      He loved his pipe and glass;      An easygoing blighter,      Who lived in Montparnasse.      But 'mid the tavern tattle      He heard some guinney say:      "When France goes forth to battle,      The Legion leads the way.          "The scourings of creation,          Of every sin and station,          The men who've known damnation,          Are picked to lead the way."      Well, Kelly joined the Legion;      They marched him day and night;      They rushed him to the region      Where largest loomed the fight.      "Behold your mighty mission,      Your destiny," said they;      "By glorious tradition      The Legion leads the way.          "With tattered banners flying          With trail of dead and dying,          On! On! All hell defying,          The Legion sweeps the way."      With grim, hard-bitten faces,      With jests of savage mirth,      They swept into their places,      The men of iron worth;      Their blooded steel was flashing;      They swung to face the fray;      Then rushing, roaring, crashing,      The Legion cleared the way.          The trail they blazed was gory;          Few lived to tell the story;          Through death they plunged to glory;          But, oh, they cleared the way!      Now Kelly lay a-dying,      And dimly saw advance,      With split new banners flying,      The fantassins of France.      Then up amid the melee      He rose from where he lay;      "Come on, me boys," says Kelly,      "The Layjun lades the way!"          Aye, while they faltered, doubting          (Such flames of doom were spouting),          He caught them, thrilled them, shouting:          "The Layjun lades the way!"      They saw him slip and stumble,      Then stagger on once more;      They marked him trip and tumble,      A mass of grime and gore;      They watched him blindly crawling      Amid hell's own affray,      And calling, calling, calling:      "The Layjun lades the way!"          And even while they wondered,          The battle-wrack was sundered;          To Victory they thundered,          But . . . Kelly led the way.      Still Kelly kept agoing;      Berserker-like he ran;      His eyes with fury glowing,      A lion of a man;      His rifle madly swinging,      His soul athirst to slay,      His slogan ringing, ringing,      "The Layjun lades the way!"          Till in a pit death-baited,          Where Huns with Maxims waited,          He plunged . . . and there, blood-sated,          To death he stabbed his way.      Now Kelly was a fellow      Who simply loathed a fight:      He loved a tavern mellow,      Grog hot and pipe alight;      I'm sure the Show appalled him,      And yet without dismay,      When Death and Duty called him,      He up and led the way.          So in Valhalla drinking          (If heroes meek and shrinking          Are suffered there), I'm thinking          'Tis Kelly leads the way.