The God-Forgotten Election

PAT MDURMER brought the tidings to the town of God-Forgotten :     There are lively days before ye, commin Parlymints dissolved!     And the boys were all excited, for the State, of course, was rotten,     And, in subsequent elections, God-Forgotten was involved.     There was little there to live for save in drinking beer and eating;     But we rose on this occasion ere the news appeared in print,     For the boys of God-Forgotten, at a wild, uproarious meeting,     Nominated Billy Blazes for the commin Parlymint.     Other towns had other favourites, but the day before the battle     Bushmen flocked to God-Forgotten, and the distant sheds were still;     Sheep were left to go to glory, and neglected mobs of cattle     Went a-straying down the river at their sweet bucolic will.     William Spouter stood for Freetrade (and his votes were split by Nottin),     He had influence behind him and he also had the tin,     But across the lonely flatlands came the cry of God-Forgotten,     Vote for Blazes and Protection, and the land youre living in!     Pat MDurmer said, Ye schaymers, please to shut yer ugly faces,     Lend yer dirty ears a momint while I give ye all a hint:     Keep ye sober till to-morrow and record yer vote for Blazes     If ye want to send a ringer to the commin Parlymint.     As a young and growin township God-Forgottens been neglected,     And, if wed be ripresinted, nows the moment to begin,     Have the local towns encouraged, local industries purtected:     Vote for Blazes, and Protection, and the land yere livin in.     I dont say that William Blazes is a perfect out-an outer,     I dont say he have the larnin, for he never had the luck;     I dont say he have the logic, or the gift of gab, like Spouter,     I dont say he have the practice, BUT I SAY HE HAVE THE PLUCK!     Now the countrys gone to ruin, and the Governments are rotten,     But hell save the public credit and purtect the public tin;     To the iverlastin glory of the name of God-Forgotten     Vote for Blazes and Protection, and the land yere livin in!     Pat MD. went on the war-path, and he worked like salts and senna,     For he organised committees full of energy and push;     And those wild committees riding through the whisky-fed Gehenna     Routed out astonished voters from their humpies in the bush.     Everything on wheels was rinted, and half-sobered drunks were shot in;     Said MDurmer to the driver, If ye want to save yer skin,     Never stop to wet yer whistles, drive like hell to God-Forgotten,     Make the villains plump for Blazes, and the land theyre livin, in.     Half the local long-departed (for the purpose resurrected)     Plumped for Blazes and Protection, and the country where they died;     So he topped the poll by sixty, and when Blazes was elected     There was victory and triumph on the God-Forgotten side.     Then the boys got up a banquet, and our chairman, Pat MDurmer,     Was next day discovered sleeping in the local bakers bin,     All the dough had risen round him, but we heard a smothered murmur,     Vote for Blazes, and Protection, and the land yere livin in.     Now the great Sir William Blazes lives in London, cross the waters     And they say his city mansion is the swellest in West End,     But I very often wonder if his torey sons and daughters     Ever heard of Billy Blazes who was once the peoples friend.     Does his biassed memory linger round that wild electioneering     When the men of God-Forgotten stuck to him through thick and thin?     Does he ever, in his dreaming, hear the cry above the cheering:     Vote for Blazes and Protection, and the land youre livin in?     Ah, the bush was grand in those days, and the Western boys were daisies,     And their scheming and their dodging would outdo the wildest print;     Still my recollection lingers round the time when Billy Blazes     Was returned by God-Forgotten to the Commin Parlymint:     Still I keep a sign of canvas, twas a mate of mine that made it,     And its paint is cracked and powdered, and its threads are bare and thin,     Yet upon its grimy surface you can read in letters faded:     Vote for Blazes and Protection, and the land youre livin in.