The New Year's Resolve.

Says Dick, "ther's a nooation sprung up i' mi yed,     For th' furst time i'th' whole coorse o' mi life,     An aw've takken a fancy aw'st like to be wed,     If aw knew who to get for a wife.     Aw dooant want a woman wi' beauty, nor brass,     For aw've nawther to booast on misel;     What aw want is a warm-hearted, hard-workin lass,     An ther's lots to be fun, aw've heeard tell.     To be single is all weel enuff nah an then,     But it's awk'ard when th' weshin day comes;     For aw nivver think sooapsuds agree weel wi' men;     They turn all mi ten fingers to thumbs.     An aw'm sure it's a fact, long afoor aw get done,     Aw'm slopt throo mi waist to mi fit;     An th' floor's in a pond, as if th' peggy-tub run,     An mi back warks as if it 'ud split.     Aw fancied aw'st manage at breead-bakin best;     Soa one day aw bethowt me to try,     But aw gate soa flustered, aw ne'er thowt o'th' yeast,     Soa aw mud as weel offered to fly.     Aw did mak a dumplin, but a'a! dear a me!     Abaght that lot aw hardly dar think;     Aw ne'er fan th' mistak till aw missed th' sooap, yo see,     An saw th' suet i'th' sooap-box o'th' sink.     But a new-year's just startin, an soa aw declare     Aw'll be wed if a wife's to be had;     For mi clooas is soa ragg'd woll aw'm ommost hauf bare,     An thease mullucks, they're drivin me mad.     Soa, if yo should know, or should chonce to hear tell,     Ov a lass 'at to wed is inclined,     Talegraft me at once, an aw'll see her misel,     Afoor shoo can alter her mind."