The Telegraph Operator

I will not wash my face;     I will not brush my hair;     I "pig" around the place -     There's nobody to care.     Nothing but rock and tree;     Nothing but wood and stone,     Oh, God, it's hell to be     Alone, alone, alone!     Snow-peaks and deep-gashed draws     Corral me in a ring.     I feel as if I was     The only living thing     On all this blighted earth;     And so I frowst and shrink,     And crouching by my hearth     I hear the thoughts I think.     I think of all I miss -     The boys I used to know;     The girls I used to kiss;     The coin I used to blow:     The bars I used to haunt;     The racket and the row;     The beers I didn't want     (I wish I had 'em now).     Day after day the same,     Only a little worse;     No one to grouch or blame -     Oh, for a loving curse!     Oh, in the night I fear,     Haunted by nameless things,     Just for a voice to cheer,     Just for a hand that clings!     Faintly as from a star     Voices come o'er the line;     Voices of ghosts afar,     Not in this world of mine;     Lives in whose loom I grope;     Words in whose weft I hear     Eager the thrill of hope,     Awful the chill of fear.     I'm thinking out aloud;     I reckon that is bad;     (The snow is like a shroud) -     Maybe I'm going mad.     Say! wouldn't that be tough?     This awful hush that hugs     And chokes one is enough     To make a man go "bugs".     There's not a thing to do;     I cannot sleep at night;     No wonder I'm so blue;     Oh, for a friendly fight!     The din and rush of strife;     A music-hall aglow;     A crowd, a city, life -     Dear God, I miss it so!     Here, you have moped enough!     Brace up and play the game!     But say, it's awful tough -     Day after day the same     (I've said that twice, I bet).     Well, there's not much to say.     I wish I had a pet,     Or something I could play.     Cheer up! don't get so glum     And sick of everything;     The worst is yet to come;     God help you till the Spring.     God shield you from the Fear;     Teach you to laugh, not moan.     Ha! ha! it sounds so queer -     Alone, alone, alone!