Dows Flat

Dows flat. Thats its name;     And I reckon that you     Are a stranger? The same?     Well, I thought it was true,     For thar isnt a man on the river as cant spot the place at first view.     It was called after Dow,     Which the same was an ass,     And as to the how     Thet the thing kem to pass,     Jest tie up your hoss to that buckeye, and sit ye down here in the grass.     You see this yer Dow     Hed the worst kind of luck;     He slipped up somehow     On each thing thet he struck.     Why, ef hed a straddled thet fence-rail, the derned thingd get up and buck.     He mined on the bar     Till he couldnt pay rates;     He was smashed by a car     When he tunneled with Bates;     And right on the top of his trouble kem his wife and five kids from the States.     It was rough, mighty rough;     But the boys they stood by,     And they brought him the stuff     For a house, on the sly;     And the old woman, well, she did washing, and took on when no one was nigh.     But this yer luck of Dows     Was so powerful mean     That the spring near his house     Dried right up on the green;     And he sunk forty feet down for water, but nary a drop to be seen.     Then the bar petered out,     And the boys wouldnt stay;     And the chills got about,     And his wife fell away;     But Dow in his well kept a peggin in his usual ridikilous way.     One day, it was June,     And a year ago, jest     This Dow kem at noon     To his work like the rest,     With a shovel and pick on his shoulder, and derringer hid in his breast.     He goes to the well,     And he stands on the brink,     And stops for a spell     Jest to listen and think:     For the sun in his eyes (jest like this, sir!), you see, kinder made the cuss blink.     His two ragged gals     In the gulch were at play,     And a gownd that was Sals     Kinder flapped on a bay:     Not much for a man to be leavin, but his all, as Ive heerd the folks say.     And Thats a peart hoss     Thet youve got, aint it now?     What might be her cost?     Eh? Oh! Well, then, Dow     Lets see, well, that forty-foot grave wasnt his, sir, that day, anyhow.     For a blow of his pick     Sorter caved in the side,     And he looked and turned sick,     Then he trembled and cried.     For you see the dern cuss had struck Water? Beg your parding, young man, there you lied!     It was gold, in the quartz,     And it ran all alike;     And I reckon five oughts     Was the worth of that strike;     And that house with the coopilows hisn, which the same isnt bad for a Pike.     Thets why its Dows Flat;     And the thing of it is     That he kinder got that     Through sheer contrairiness:     For twas water the derned cuss was seekin, and his luck made him certain to miss.     Thets so! Thars your way,     To the left of yon tree;     But a look hyur, say?     Wont you come up to tea?     No? Well, then the next time youre passin; and ask after Dow,    and thets me.