Face To Face.

Dead! and all the haughty fate      Fair on throat and face of wax,      White, calm hands crossed still and lax,     Cold, impassionate!     Dead! and no word whispered low      At the dull ear now could wake      One responsive chord or make     One wan temple glow.     Dead! and no hot tear would stir      All that woman sweet and fair,      Woman soul from feet to hair     Which was once of her.     God! and thus to die! and I -      I must live though life be but      One long, hard, monotonous rut,     There to plod and - die!     Creeds are well in such a case;      But no sermon could have wrought      More of faith than you have taught     With your pale, dead face.     And I see it as you see -      One mistake, so very small!      Yet so great it mangled all,     Left you this and me!     Oft I pondered saying, "Sure      She could never live such life!"      And the truth stabbed like a knife     When I found you pure.     Pure, so pure! and me bemoiled,      Loathly as loathed vermin, just      As weak souls are left of lust -     Loveless, low, and soiled.     Nay! I loved you then and love! -      Grand, great eyes, I see them yet,      Set like luminous gems of jet     In wax lids above.     Lips - O poor, dumb, chideless lips!      Once as red as life could make,      Moist as wan wild roses wake     When the wild dew drips.     Hair - imperial, full, and warm      As a Grace's, where one stone      Precious lay ensnared and shone     Like a star in storm.     Eyes - at parting big with pain;      God! I see them and the tear      In them - big as eyes of deer     Led by lights and slain!     Life so true! I falsely cursed -      Lips that, curled with scorn and pride,      Hurt me though I said they lied,     While the true heart burst.     Rest! my heart has suffered too:      And this life had woe enough      For the little dole of love     Given to me and you.     Can you hear me? can you know      What I am and how it came,      You, beyond me like a flame,     You, before me like the snow!     Dead! and all my heart a cup      Hollowed for sad, bitter tears,      Bitter in the bitter years     Slowly brimming up.     Sleep! 'tis well! but might have been      Better! - yes, God knows it might!      Better for me in His sight     And my soul more clean.     Sleep in very peace! but I      With Earth's other fools will stay,      Live 'mid laughter, day by day     Mocking laugh and - die.     You will know me now, I know,      But in life had never known      How, indeed, I was alone -     But, 'tis better so.     And I know you what you were,      Faithful and - it were no use,      Only to yourself abuse, -     I shall tell you there.     There beyond the lightning and      The long clouds and utter skies,      Moons and suns and stars that rise,     Where we'll understand.