My Room. To G.E.M.

'Tis a little room, my friend;     A baby-walk from end to end;     All the things look sadly real,     This hot noontide's Unideal.     Seek not refuge at the casement,     There's no pasture for amazement     But a house most dim and rusty,     And a street most dry and dusty;     Seldom here more happy vision     Than water-cart's blest apparition,     We'll shut out the staring space,     Draw the curtains in its face.     Close the eyelids of the room,     Fill it with a scarlet gloom:     Lo! the walls on every side     Are transformed and glorified;     Ceiled as with a rosy cloud     Furthest eastward of the crowd,     Blushing faintly at the bliss     Of the Titan's good-night kiss,     Which her westward sisters share,--     Crimson they from breast to hair.     'Tis the faintest lends its dye     To my room--ah, not the sky!     Worthy though to be a room     Underneath the wonder-dome:     Look around on either hand,     Are we not in fairy-land?     In the ruddy atmosphere     All familiar things appear     Glowing with a mystery     In the red light shadowy;     Lasting bliss to you and me,     Colour only though it be.     Now on the couch, inwrapt in mist     Of vapourized amethyst,     Lie, as in a rose's heart;     Secret things I will impart;     Any time you would receive them;     Easier though you will believe them     In dissolving dreamy red,     Self-same radiance that is shed     From the summer-heart of Poet,     Flushing those that never know it.     Tell me not the light thou viewest     Is a false one; 'tis the truest;     'Tis the light revealing wonder,     Filling all above and under;     If in light you make a schism,     'Tis the deepest in the prism.     The room looks common; but the fact is     'Tis a cell of magic practice,     So disguised by common daylight,     By its disenchanting grey light,     Only spirit-eyes, mesmeric,     See its glories esoteric.     There, that case against the wall,     Glowingly purpureal!     A piano to the prosy--     Not to us in twilight rosy:     'Tis a cave where Nereids lie.     Naiads, Dryads, Oreads sigh,     Dreaming of the time when they     Danced in forest and in bay.     In that chest before your eyes,     Nature's self enchanted lies;     Awful hills and midnight woods;     Sunny rains in solitudes;     Deserts of unbounded longing;     Blessed visions, gladness thronging;     All this globe of life unfoldeth     In phantom forms that coffer holdeth.     True, unseen; for 'tis enchanted--     What is that but kept till wanted?     Do you hear that voice of singing?     'Tis the enchantress that is flinging     Spells around her baby's riot,     Music's oil the waves to quiet:     She at once can disenchant them,     To a lover's wish to grant them;     She can make the treasure casket     Yield its riches, as that basket     Yielded up the gathered flowers;     Yet its mines, and fields, and bowers,     Full remain, as mother Earth     Never tired of giving birth.     Do you doubt me? Wait till night     Brings black hours and white delight;     Then, as now, your limbs outstretching,     Yield yourself to her bewitching.     She will bring a book of spells     Writ like crabbed oracles;     Wherewith necromantic fingers     Raise the ghosts of parted singers:     Straight your senses will be bound     In a net of torrent sound.     For it is a silent fountain,     Fed by springs from unseen mountain.     Till with gestures cabalistic,     Crossing, lining figures mystic,     (Diagram most mathematic,     Simple to these signs erratic,)     O'er the seals her quick hands going     Loose the rills and set them flowing:     Pent up music rushing out     Bathes thy spirit all about;     Spell-bound nature, freed again,     Joyous revels in thy brain.     On a mountain-top you stand,     Looking o'er a sunny land;     Giant forces marching slow,     Rank on rank, the great hills go,     On and on without a stay,     Melting in the blue away.     Wondrous light, more wondrous shading;     High relief in faintness fading;     Branching streams, like silver veins,     Meet and part in dells and plains.     There a woody hollow lies,     Dumb with love, and bright with eyes;     Moorland tracks of broken ground     Rising o'er, it all around:     Traveller climbing from the grove     Needs the tender heavens above.     "Ah, my pictured life," you cry,     "Fading into sea and sky!"     Lost in thought that gently grieves you,     All the fairy landscape leaves you;     Sinks the sadness into rest,     Ripple-like on water's breast;     Mother's bosom rests the daughter,--     Grief the ripple, Love the water.     All the past is strangely blended     In a mist of colours splendid,     But chaotic as to form,     An unfeatured beauty-storm.     Wakes within, the ancient mind     For a gloriousness defined:     As she sought and knew your pleasure,--     Wiling with a dancing measure,     Underneath your closed eyes     She calls the shapes of clouded skies;     White forms flushing hyacinthine     Twine in curvings labyrinthine;     Seem with godlike graceful feet,     For such mazy motion meet,     To press from air each lambent note,     On whose throbbing fire they float;     With an airy wishful gait     On each others' motion wait;     Naked arms and vesture free     Fill up the dance of harmony.     Gone the measure polyhedral!     Springs aloft a high cathedral;     Every arch, like praying arms     Upward flung in love's alarms,     Knit by clasped hands o'erhead,     Heaves to heaven the weight of dread.     Underneath thee, like a cloud,     Gathers music, dim not loud,     Swells thy bosom with devotion,     Floats thee like a wave of ocean;     Vanishes the pile away,--     In heaven thou kneelest down to pray.     Let the sounds but reach thy heart,     Straight thyself magician art;     Walkest open-eyed through earth;     Seest wonders in their birth,     Whence they come and whither go;     Thou thyself exalted so,     Nature's consciousness, whereby     On herself she turns her eye.     Only heed thou worship God;     Else thou stalkest on thy sod,     Puppet-god of picture-world,     For thy foolish gaze unfurled;     Mirror-thing of things below thee.     Thy own self can never know thee;     Not a high and holy actor;     A reflector, and refractor;     Helpless in thy gift of light,     Self-consuming into night.     Lasting yet the roseate glory!     I must hasten with my story     Of the little room's true features,     Seldom seen by mortal creatures;     Lest my prophet-vision fading     Leave me in the darkness wading.     What are those upon the wall,     Ranged in rows symmetrical?     They are books, an owl would say;     But the owl's night is the day:     Of these too, if you have patience,     I can give you revelations:     Through the walls of Time and Sight,     Doors they are to the Infinite;     Through the limits that embrace us,     Openings to the eternal spaces,     Round us all the noisy day,     Full of silences alway;     Round us all the darksome night,     Ever full of awful light:     And, though closed, may still remind us     There is mystery behind us.     That, my friend? Now, it is curious,     You should hit upon the spurious!     'Tis a blind, a painted door:     Knock at it for evermore,     Never vision it affords     But its panelled gilded boards;     Behind it lieth nought at all,     But the limy, webby wall.     Oh no, not a painted block--     Not the less a printed mock;     A book, 'tis true; no whit the more     A revealing out-going door.     There are two or three such books     For a while in others' nooks;     Where they should no longer be,     But for reasons known to me.     Do not open that one though.     It is real; but if you go     Careless to it, as to dance,     You'll see nothing for your glance;     Blankness, deafness, blindness, dumbness,     Soon will stare you to a numbness.     No, my friend; it is not wise     To open doors into the skies,     As into a little study,     Where a feeble brain grows muddy.     Wait till night, and you shall be     Left alone with mystery;     Light this lamp's white softened ray,     (Another wonder by the way,)     Then with humble faith and prayer,     Ope the door with patient care:     Yours be calmness then, and strength     For the sight you see at length.     Sometimes, after trying vainly,     With much effort, forced, ungainly,     To entice the rugged door     To yield up its wondrous lore,     With a sudden burst of thunder     All its frame is dashed asunder;     The gulfy silence, lightning-fleet,     Shooteth hellward at thy feet.     Take thou heed lest evil terror     Snare thee in a downward error,     Drag thee through the narrow gate,     Give thee up to windy fate,     To be blown for evermore     Up and down without a shore;     For to shun the good as ill     Makes the evil bolder still.     But oftener far the portal opes     With the sound of coming hopes;     On the joy-astonished eyes     Awful heights of glory rise;     Mountains, stars, and dreadful space,     The Eternal's azure face.     In storms of silence self is drowned,     Leaves the soul a gulf profound,     Where new heavens and earth arise,     Rolling seas and arching skies.     Gathers slow a vapour o'er thee     From the ocean-depths before thee:     Lo! the vision all hath vanished,     Thou art left alone and banished;     Shut the door, thou findest, groping,     Without chance of further oping.     Thou must wait until thy soul     Rises nearer to its goal;     Till more childhood strength has given--     Then approach this gate of Heaven:     It will open as before,     Yielding wonders, yet in store     For thee, if thou wilt turn to good     Things already understood.     Why I let such useless lumber     Useful bookshelves so encumber?     I will tell thee; for thy question     Of wonders brings me to the best one.     There's a future wonder, may be--     Sure a present magic baby;     (Patience, friend, I know your looks--     What has that to do with books?)     With her sounds of molten speech     Quick a parent's heart to reach,     Though uncoined to words sedate,     Or even to sounds articulate;     Yet sweeter than the music's flowing,     Which doth set her music going.     Now our highest wonder-duty     Is with this same wonder-beauty;     How, with culture high and steady,     To unfold a magic-lady;     How to keep her full of wonder     At all things above and under;     Her from childhood never part,     Change the brain, but keep the heart.     She is God's child all the time;     On all the hours the child must climb,     As on steps of shining stairs     Leading up the path of prayers.     So one lesson from our looks,     Must be this: to honour books,     As a strange and mystic band     Which she cannot understand;     Scarce to touch them without fear,     Never, but when I am near,     As a priest, to temple-rite     Leading in the acolyte.     But when she has older grown,     And can see a difference shown,     She must learn, 'tis not appearing     Makes a book fit for revering;     To distinguish and divide     'Twixt the form and soul inside;     That a book is more than boards,     Leaves and words in gathered hordes,     Which no greater good can do man     Than the goblin hollow woman,     Or a pump without a well,     Or priest without an oracle.     Form is worthless, save it be     Type of an infinity;     Sign of something present, true,     Though unopened to the view,     Heady in its bosom holding     What it will be aye unfolding,     Never uttering but in part,     From an unexhausted heart.     Sight convincing to her mind,     I will separate kind from kind,     Take those books, though honoured by her     Lay them on the study fire,     For their form's sake somewhat tender,     Yet consume them to a cinder;     Years of reverence shall not save them     From the greedy flames that crave them.     You shall see this slight Immortal,     Half-way yet within life's portal;     Gathering gladness, she looks back,     Streams it forward on her track;     Wanders ever in the dance     Of her own sweet radiance.     Though the glory cease to burn,     Inward only it will turn;     Make her hidden being bright,     Make herself a lamp of light;     And a second gate of birth     Will take her to another earth.     But, my friend, I've rattled plenty     To suffice for mornings twenty;     And I must not toss you longer     On this torrent waxing stronger.     Other things, past contradiction,     Here would prove I spoke no fiction,     Did I lead them up, choragic,     To reveal their nature magic.     There is that machine, glass-masked,     With continual questions tasked,     Ticking with untiring rock:     It is called an eight-day clock.     But to me the thing appears     Made for winding up the years,     Drawing on, fast as it can,     The day when comes the Son of Man.     On the sea the sunshine broods,     And the shining tops of woods;     We will leave these oracles,     Finding others 'mid the hills.