my 'best friend'

I had this friend. She told me that she would ALWAYS be there for me, No matter what i said or did. Well now she is not here. I wonder what her defination of always is, it must not be long casue i am here now and she is not. I know that i messed up, but arent friends supposed to forgive? Maybe i messed up to many times, Maybe she got sick of me, Maybe she could not handle the things that i told her, Maybe it is just me, Maybe i messed up and that is why she is gone. I will never know, I wish that i did know so i could fix things and she could be part of my life again. I would not be suprised if it was me though. I mess up a lot of good things in my life, Especially with the ones that i love the most. I wish that she was here with me now, I really need her. I try to move on but no one can ever take her place, No one can even come close!! Written March 15th, 2002 © on Mar 15 2002 11:36 AM PST   18 • 0 • 10