Ketamine 6 - Sliding Back to Purple

Ah, alleviation of reality. Truth as I knew it was not something to be faced or contemplated at this point. If I had had the power to do so, I would’ve remained in that ether forever. It was not until this point, when I knew there was a difference between what was and what is, that I was able to grasp onto myself in that state of nonexistence and sit down. So I sat. At that time, I was more nowhere than ever. All was black, and it was very calming. I realized there was nothing here but me, now, and that I must take this opportunity to reflect on all the other perspectives I had thus far existed in, lest this be the last time I would be able to obtain this one. There was a silence so profound that it was more than an absence of sound; it destroyed sound. I have full confidence that I was still hearing the noise of the operation, but my mind made a desperate grasp for clarity when a moment later I would’ve wasted the entire experience. A lack of external energy is something with honest beauty. If there is nothing but you, then you can, by sheer will, create everything. And that is just what I did. I rode myself down a winding path through splintered forests of my memories, and took note of all the errors and lesson in my past. I remembered all the pennies dropped and forgotten, I remembered every hole I stumbled into, I remembered the times when I lied in the hole until someone drew me up, I remembered the times when I drew people up from their holes, and I remembered the few times when I shook the dust from my feet and walked on. I was not sad. Written January 9th, 2002 © on Jan 08 2002 03:49 PM PST   0 • 10