I Forgive You!

I Learned to Forgive I was thirteen with no real home I was scared and felt all alone To boarding school I went to stay Dad - Mom, you sent me away. Dad, why did you hate me so? You knew I never wanted to go. Forgive me, your child I was not Your stepdaughter is what you got. I looked up to you, you were so tall I wanted to be your best child of all. You were my hero – my superman I was a kid hiding – head in the sand. Dad you stomped and screamed You did not care who you demeaned. How can I protect me from you? With enough padding – TRUE. No more beatings or fights No more kicking mom and me out in dark nights No more hiding in the alley with fright So no one could see us in nightgowns at night. Dad, you abused me when I was seven How could I get to heaven I felt so bad and ugly inside I decided I had to hide. You wanted me to lose weight I keep on gaining since I was eight. There I was - behind this fat Smaller and smaller is where I was at The more the padding increased The hurting I crammed inside, decreased. As long as I hid – I would not have to face What happened to me, my disgrace. Last year I was 450 pounds at the top I decided me hurting me had to stop Congested Heart Failure is what I had Thyroid, Sleep Apnea, Asthma - all bad. 106 pound lost has happened today My 130 pounds is beginning to display I have learned compassion and love for me too From now on – I will take care of me for you. No more Sleep Apnea or Heart Failure for me God has healed my whole body Through His strength I learned to forgive He forgave me and now I can live. Through the years my dad grew up He cares and loves me – we made up I no longer have to hide from you or me I can just write and my past is history. This is the deepest I have dug inside of me.  I pray it brings at least one person can heal inside as I share with you! Written September 1st, 2000 © on Nov 20 2001 12:55 PM PST, Dawn Anne Hall    0 • 20 • 8