mazes

Searching through a maze of gray clouds and enormous storms,   I find myself so confused by the lack of warmth.     Hidden clues and answers with no riddles   haunt a blinded soul.       Following the yellow stars that invade the bluest sky of the night,     as it shines on the shapes below,           I find myself reaching for the need to know.       My mind is on slight delay and I know parts of the puzzle,             but what will happen in the end is something I can't pretend   to understand.               Statues of stone and ice create beautiful illusions as they stare so coldy into the space that nature has lain before them,       and the man-made solutions will be persistent in the confusion               as they keep up their charade.       Running up and down the steps that are created with each move, I seem to be running out of places to go.           Never will I be  closed to those around me.     I will keep my eyes open and see.                 I will never become any of those who are aware.       And it will never bother me if they didn't ever really care.   The tears are still falling       but I'm through calling   for anyone anymore.                 It's time to let everyone go.  I turn the other way.  Disconnection       will be complete.  I begin to understand what is needed to delete                       the waters of emotion in my heart.    It's time for me to start             showing myself what I can be.    I can be free       without the condascending crap that they keep giving me.                     Golden tones and fire-broken bones       grind the cobblestone path into the pebbles of boring drones,             and the the mazes of these thoughts are becoming the clones         of what I once was.                     Numb.  This time I see why.  I'd rather be in this desolate land     in my chosen lonliness.  It's a lot better than living a lie with all of those       in the agenda around me. Written March 12th, 2002 © on Mar 12 2002 11:44 AM PST   18 • 0 • 1