Confessions of a Mother

* I carried you within me as you grew Remembering the first movements Of your tiny body inside of mine I was filled with awe and wonder at your birth It was then I learned the true meaning of happiness I held you to my breast when you hungered To my body when you cried In my arms to gently rock you to sleep Watching those shining eyes and innocent smiles It was then I learned the true meaning of love Without warning  you were torn from my life Leaving behind a void Filled with anguish and pain As if my insides were ripped away Replaced by numbness and fear It was then I learned the true meaning of emptiness You grew up without me in your life Your childhood belonged to someone else The mother daughter bond was severed You were robbed of my love And I of yours It was then I learned the true meaning of loss I met a young adult at the airport that day A mirror image of myself I felt the distance as I hugged you The first time in sixteen years You weren’t “mine” anymore It was then I learned the true meaning of pain I need for you to love me but you stand just out of reach Always that safe distance between us Strangers in so many ways, the years go by I want to be there when you need someone but I have lost the path to your heart Wandering in a strange place Feeling lost and alone It is now that I learn - I don’t know how to love you. *For My Daughter, in hopes that someday she will accept a \ Written February 5th, 2002 © on Feb 05 2002 06:28 AM PST, Mad Moon   0 • 18 • 1