The Innocent (long read)

Blessed by heaven above with two angels. One I called wife, the other I called daughter. What a lucky man I was. All my dreams realized in one day. I loved children so, and now I had one to call my own. One of the sweetest most innocent little darlings any parent could ever hope for. She was all mine. I loved her so. She and her mother brought so much joy into my life. My love for them was matched only by the love they felt for me. We had a special something that most only dream of. We were a family filled with love for each other. This sweet little lady, trusting, loving, and so innocent, her care and her heart in my hands. Her step-father, a role I took on with all the best of intentions. Wanting to give her a second chance to have a normal family. There was just one problem. I had no idea of how to be a father to this lovely little angel. All I knew was that I loved her and her mother so much. I wanted so to be a good father and husband. A special education is required to care for the sick. If you want to drive a car you must first pass a test. Almost everything we buy comes with instruction. Everything but a marriage license. You must learn how to make a marriage work one day at a time. You must learn how to become a father one day at a time as well. Every mistake you make effects the ones you love most. Being human mistakes were made by all. All our mistakes came between us a little at a time until they formed walls. Not only did these walls get in the way of the love we had for each other, but it also cost us the trust and respect that we had for each other. How could we let this happen? Didn't we know what was at stake? I can only speak for myself. I didn't really understand what my family meant to me till it was gone. It's so sad to think it took this to finally open my eyes, seeing my family walking out of my life. Where my heart was once filled with love, it is now filled with sorrow. I try to remember the innocent years before the walls. These memories bring me much joy in the reflection of them, and much sorrow at the loss of what once was. My love still remains though it is out of view, hidden forever by these walls.Old pain here and Lessons learned Written October 1st, 1996 © on Dec 28 2001 06:57 AM PST   0 • 10