Holding grace
I don't know how people perceive me to be but I'm not me and I'm not what I used to be Outside I'm laughing inside I'm crying, screaming trying to get out and somewhere in this body of mine I'm holding grace The hardest part it's in my soul and I have yet to find out where I start in there grace is in my toes in my hair in my waist but not in the way you may think grace is undefinable for what it is in me but I can feel it's there and I know it's trying to escape The forces of a higher class one that is not understood so it can't be destroyed and is overwhelming me Breaking me down to the last vein and so far in this battle I am losing So what if i lose? where do i go from there? sounds like that could be suicidal but I'm striding to win Allthough nobody sees my real pain so I have no real help not that if i did I'd be okay But it's hard when you don't know my real feelings and the words coming out of me don't make sense so nobody comprehends The only thing I can tell you is that I'm holding grace and I will find it. Written January 13th, 2002 © on Jan 12 2002 04:41 PM PST 18 • 0 • 10
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"I don't know..."