Life In The Cell

Life in the celll time spent in hell Falling...falling...falling from grace with darkness and ugliness taking its place Don't lock me in no, not again Pea green doors slam tight Heavy ring of silver keys around the waste Of those that determine your fate Silent screams reverberate What's in store what's in store what's in store For the girl next door Come with me and see through my eyes the adolescent unit in their demise. There was mean Irene of intimidating size, looked straight through you with cold calculating eyes. "Watch out for her," I was warned - for from her grandmother's arms Irene was torn, weeping like a baby so forlorn...a flat iron to gramma's skull when things weren't going oh so well. She looked me up and down then said,"Your pretty what a pity it won't last, I'll hurt you like you aint been hurt before, if you know what's good for you you'll walk out the door." Next came Helen seizing on the floor never did she speak - I knew not what pain she bore. Then a little girl with twisted legs and arms Radio to her ear she lived in WENE world chanting the songs she favored pop rock...obsession she couldn't stop... autistic they say Friday the 13th at 13 years old a day in infamy that left my soul cold What had i done that this price I should pay Fear the motivator to finding my way Along came lank and lean Barbara Ann with perfect bone structure she held out her hand "Pleased to meet you," she said. Wrists dressed in gauze wraps a suicide attempt gone bad modeling agency rejected her couldn't tell mom and dad... Then a quiet shy girl name of Mary parents stuck her here because she was guilty of being pregnant with her father's child (that came out in therapy after a while) Latavia the multiple introduced herself as Joe. Joe was a truck driver on vacation said he wished us little girls were women what with a man's needs and all... Joe often in solitaire couldn't hurt the little girls there. Dinese was schizophrenic and feared the things she heard voices from the heavens would tell her things absurd and she always; always took them at their word. My heart stalled when I saw Valerie. She had been a classmate I didn't know well but I saved her from a beating outside the school yard the year before. A skinny little girl, quiet as a mouse... What the hell was she doing in this house! Her body a puffy pin cushion, hair scraggly and she smelled of B.O. I was flabberghasted and it showed. She had walked a dangerous road. Alcohol, uppers, downers, and coke; reefer, hashish, now LSD spoke. A bad trip I was told, might never be right. Somehow she remembered me. She slowly patted my arm and smiled; spittle at the corners of her mouth, eyes glazed...I couldn't stand it and had to look away. Indoctrination begins: All personal belongings under lock and key Taken to the bathroom where told you had to pee No doors on the stalls, side partitions a substitute for walls To the shower room stripped down body cavities checked (I found I could not speak and in fear i held my breath) Sprayed me down with some kind of disinfectant threw me a towel and told me to get dressed. Medicine time lined up in a row cheeks checked with a flashlight to make sure it went down right The adolescent unit not a pretty sight Life in the Cell time spent in hell falling, falling, falling, from grace with darkness and ugliness taking its place Written March 2nd, 2002 © on Mar 01 2002 06:08 PM PST   0 • 1