Moon-beams through my window

I can feel myself Slipping awayDrifting awayWhich drug will I take today?Which drug will I let make me today?Is this what its all come down to?A jagged little pillDisguising who I really amPainting me in false colors instead of myDeep violet,dark maroon,black,or sapphire blueIs this what its all come down to?A numbing blindness hovering around meHow can this be me sitting in this room again?AloneWishing for something besides what I've gotEveryday the pills multiply I can feel them growing inside meConsuming my soul,my mindIt sucks the tears from my eyes and the feeling from my skin soI walk along in a clouded daze seeing everything upsidedown though it still seems to be so clearForcing words from my toungeI swallow later down with my perfect little pink pill soI can see rainbows painted by a five year old instead of The moon who once knew me wellWhen I would sit outside on my windowsillNow I pull my shade down as I swallow that tabletI don't want to hurt the moon's feelings for I know She and I have not spoken for some time and I can't bare to tell her of the watercolored rainbows that run along the wallsThough even with the shade drawn I knowShe can see the flecks of light dancing inside my room butI haven't the heart or the courage to show the full veiw ofIllusion's beautiful rainbows who stand so petty next to the moon Written September 20th, 2001 © on Sep 28 2001 03:24 AM PST   18 • 0 • 10