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The Great Escape (Humor)

By Maureen

Topics: Poetry Source: AllPoetry Original source

Did you hear about the cow who escaped from a farm in Cincinnati and was on the run for 15 days? It's a true story and I bring to you the diary she kept for the first 5 days. She lost her pen in a flood caused when her udder burst. Day 1 Everyone completed their assignments and diversion went perfectly. Humans froze when we all rolled on our backs and began kicking wildly in the air. Not sure if I'm the only one to escape or not. Unable to contact the underground, they took my bell. Spent the night standing next to a Gateway Computer store. Day 2 Several near misses with authorities. Getting hungry. Now have green and blue spots after stumbling into a paintball game. No contact yet. Rolled in mud to avoid thermal detection. Day 3 Beginning to wonder where all of the vegetarian animal rights people are. Found food. Pressure building in udders. Must find a farmer soon. Spent the night in front of the Cincinnati Art Museum. Covered with mud and paint, they were clueless. Day 4 Found water and washed off.  Overheard people talking while standing outside Wal-Mart. They have no idea where I am. Made $3.50 by shaking with little kids on my back. Need to find farm to spread the word not to get on the truck for the "hayride". Found perfect hiding place. Spent the rest of the day posing on the Chick-fil-A billboard. Day 5 I still believe others made it out too. Either way, the rebellion is growing. Cold. Found food and water. Laying low. Spent all day posing on the Chick-fil-A billboard again. They don't suspect a thing. If I don't find a way to get milked soon, I'll explode. This story is udderly amazing! COW POWER! YEAH!  :o) My friend sent me this.  MOOOOOHAHA! Written March 6th, 2002 © on Mar 06 2002 04:35 AM PST, Maureen Halasovski    0 • 7

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"Did you hear about the cow who escaped from a farm..."

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Author:Maureen

Source:AllPoetry

"Did you hear about the cow who escaped from a farm..." by Maureen

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