Lady So Fat

There once was a lady very fat She took up the state of Texas when she sat Her Twinkies she ordered by the pound Just to make her even more round She was a walking monument, no lie She was the largest skyscraper to touch the sky When people saw her they made a big fuss Yelling at her to keep it in the circus On top of her lard she didn*t wear diamonds or fur She instead was Goodwill*s biggest customer She never owned a pet because she knew if she did She would have squashed it with her fat and thought it had hid She was once asked for a role on Jerry Springer She refused at first but was then offered a Zinger She was on there as a fat over weighted Twinkie eater But soon ended up being the whole packs leader When she would pass on the street the hicks and the bums Their kids would say, “Oh no run Ma here it comes!” One time she was down there in Cancoon And one of the locals thought she was an escape Baboon She*s bigger than you think, we*re inside her right now I*m talking elephant size huge not just a cow One day she fell in love, but she broke it For weeks Cupid had a really big fit When she died she wasn*t buried six feet under She was placed in a museum for all to wonder. Written December 28th, 2001 © on Dec 28 2001 12:26 PM PST    18 • 0 • 14