Laugh with me, blubird...'tis better than cryin'!

I’ve been called hot-tempered, With stubborn, my best quality, I’m fed up now, and tired of My man loving his TV... Weekends used to be for dancing, For picnics in the park… Rowboat rides out on the lake, Counting fireflies after dark. But then came cable hook-up, Digital meant more to see… Now he's got that freakin’ dish, Which means he's lookin’ less at me. I’m not a quitter, won't give in, And I’ve learned a thing or two. Went and rented one of those Dallas cowgirl’s outfits, WOO-HOO! Complete with little flirty skirt, Boots and big white hat... Sexy hairdo and bright makeup, Served him popcorn wearing that! He grabs the bowl, glances over, With a smile filled so with cheer… “You got a fever? You're looking flushed, Oh, and you forgot my beer...” Which made me wish to be a witch, Just long enough to load, Black magic in a poof-stick; Turn him into a …toad! Now I have been known for patience, Analytic in deduction. Maybe I just need to think up, A more powerful seduction. To the sewing room, I excused myself, Digging through the remnants. Thinking bits of silk and net Might shake him from sports pennants. A costume quickly fashioned Like g-string divas wear, I’m told. Shows much more skin than anything, I’m really being bold... Beer in one hand, with a smile, I just knew he'd flip… When I swayed a lap dance at him, He just said “Where are my chips?" Toad’s too good, I'm thinking, For a man like this… One more determined try I’ll make, Just for a little kiss. I called the local animal farm, Found a baby elephant… Wrapped him up in red silk, Bare-a$$ed naked… ride, I went! Right into the den, in front Of that big screen TV… Back and forth we lumbered, That pachyderm and me. Hubby seemed to perk up… But just as I began to gloat, He said, “Honey, take the dog out, And hand me my remote.” Ggggrrrrrrrr!!!!! For sale…one wide screen TV 5-year subscription to digital cable One slightly bent satellite dish Husband thrown in for free To nice homethis is just a lark, a laugh for my friend blubird, to cheer the spirits... ;-) no starz needed, but all comments welcomed... Written March 9th, 2002 © on Mar 09 2002 10:54 AM PST   0 • 14