Not Your Little Kid

Don't you see my tear streaked face, And the redness in my eyes? So when I cry out loud, Why does it come as a surprise? You don't know, You never did, That right now, I'm not your little kid... Stop yelling at me, When I have every right to be yelling at you, But you are blind to see, All the shitty things you put me through. Like you did no wrong in this world, Just another angel without its wings, But I know the real victim here, Pain is the only thing your yelling brings. Happiness and piece of mind, When you left, they followed behind. Casting a shadow above my head, This is just another night I'll spend crying in bed. You don't know, You never did, That I've grown up now, And I'm not your little kid. It's verbal abuse, It really is, According to what my mother says. But that's the only thing you can do, Because now I can argue with you, Half the time, you don't know what the hell I'm saying... Trying to get me into the mind games you're playing. But go ahead and talk to your wife, The one you've known half of your life, The one you left our family for, You give and give, but she wants more. But go on and talk about me, You know that she'll always agree. I just don't know why you have to yell, It's like a thunder screaming from the depths of hell. And all it does is make me cry, Getting the feeling that I want to die. I try my best to get out of your way, Then when I don't speak, you yell because I have nothing to say. Well I'm sorry i had to pause... See, you yelling, look what it's caused, Bringing  back the times you'd scream at my mom, And your problems, did it ever solve them? You'd have the door shut but I could hear you... So what's the point of yelling at me too? You just don't know, And you never did, That right now, I'm not your little kid.This is about my relationship with my father when it goes bad. It's a long story but I tried to put some of it into a poem. I wrote this after I had an argument with him... Written February 18th, 2002 © on Feb 18 2002 05:58 AM PST   0 • 10