purity

Where do we go from here? she asked   although she didn't really want to know The black tears rolled prettily over her delicate cheekbones... All her life she had been searching for something Something she didn't even know existed Something almost discovered in the lonely days of childhood Something she dared not talk about   for fear it would somehow exist after all Pushing away the child   she focused on her own inability   to create the void she sometimes longed for Her inability to die, to live, to love Long nights separated short days   with a darkness she couldn't understand A darkness she couldn't accept A darkness she didn't believe in The boys had always left her with a feeling of superiority   coupled with a sense of naivete A feeling she could never justify Even to herself She drank her purity from a dirty cup   for fear that it would run over   and flood her perceptions   with unwanted sanctity Uninvited divinity She was just a little girl... So where do we go from here? she asked What am i supposed to do   with this that i've gained What am i to do   with what i have learned in vain? She laid down on the dry, brittle grass   and closed both her eyes   leaving the other, secret one open She left this world for one within   not sure of her return Written December 24th, 2001 © on Dec 24 2001 07:17 AM PST   0 • 1