underthebelljar

"How did this come to be?The monster's coming for meI scramble trying to lock the door But, I'm failingMy feet have grown into the floorSo I'm pushing as hard as I canI fear I'm not strong enough to ho..."

"Though I’m in the great dustbowlSomehow, I can think more clearlyI ride the current into the sunI don’t ride along the sky, I runDistorted by the dust, I see as I shouldAnd if I could make it disappea..."

"It's been an eternity since I've seen your face I wonder how you've changed Would I recognize you if I met you in this place? In a letter you asked if I think of you And, I reply "everyday..." An ach..."

"I try to explain But, the words that float from my mouth Evaporate before reaching your ears I want to tell you But, I know you'd take it the wrong way For how do I describe something which exists on..."

"When you slip into the great unknown And you stumble up the ladder of insecurity Would it even matter if you fell into the void Could you slide back down into the abyss of absolution? Could you come ..."

"I wander through this life What am I supposed to do with no direction? Endure, until I'm through? Enjoy this moment while I'm still here? Maybe, that's what I'm thinking now As I'm consuming this pois..."

"Tomorrow                                                                                                                                              Everyday, I live for Tomorrow But, everyday is to..."

"As I peer through the shattered window Inside the black house I once lived The walls eaten and the floors beat in I can see you dancing with my old friend He whirls you around as you laugh insanely ..."

"Threads falling from the skyTwistingThickening cablesReaching and grabbingWrapping around my fingersDesperately pullingTrying to riseLooking downJust for a brief secondThe ground shakesI quickly look ..."

"Marching in single file, A prideful procession, Dressed in white and walking on stilts. An unstained innocent, Opening my eyes, Revealing their unattainable fantasy world. Raptured with rara..."

"Did you feel it As it slipped through your fingers Once again... Did you choke up the words Or swallow them To let them settle within... Did you go up the road Stumbling, and wandering Trying to fi..."

"Have you ever waited on a call never receivedAre you like me?Have you ever stored away a thought to be pondered laterAre you like me?Have you ever winced upon a haunting memoryAre you like me?Have you..."

"She strolls along the deserted streets Waiting for some forgotten stranger to meet She dresses all in black And speaks silently She looks, but never quite finds All that she needs She treads the un..."

"Walking through halls Towards an unheard calling Legs scissoring slicing Hours to seconds The night seems to never fall Combatting the loneliness A stubborn opponent I'm always falling short It seems ..."

"“Don’t struggle, you’ll just make it worse. It’s so much easier if you succumb. Just let go, fall back!” the monster whispers in my earAnd I let go, let the darkness envelope meI know there’s no way t..."

"The way you act I guess I don't matter As your lies tickle my ears It's something I've come to expect Something I uncomfortably accept My problems just aren't as glamorous As you make your's out to be..."

"Watching the people parade In a great motley mass Strange faces slipping In and out of my focus My contemplative gaze Pondering as they pass What shapes their lives Their days I can't help, but wonde..."

"As I looked outwardsTowards the streets todayI saw the melodic massesDifferent than beforeThe individualsThe facesThe rich among the poorAncient destinyMingled among the crowdBrushing the cheeks of ba..."

"It's just like a bulletLodged deep inside my chestThis feeling in the stateOf my unshakeable unrestThe inherent lonelinessOf existenceBecause only one heart can inhabit the bodySeems amplified in meAs..."

"I adore this noiseThe instruments blending togetherInto a fine-tuned melodyDripping with inspirationIt flows into my earsThen continues all the way throughTo stir the emotions once settledThis music i..."

"Here it comes once again The effect of too many nights alone I start to look within So redundant the feeling Of disappointment Tangled up in all my shortcomings Oh, the wasted time! Oh, the lack of ac..."

"As I choose my new path Heading straight ahead and looking back There's always the haunting black cat Twisting, turning, switching roads Trying to lose it But, failing completely It follows like ..."

"Trapped in the shellCovered, tarped in worn skinShaking to breakNaked and analyzedFalling down like glassWith the rhythm in the distanceMaking the monsters danceTo an unsteady beatThe buried emotion c..."

"It's been two months now since I've seen your face My heart sunk when I heard the doorbell ring But, got there only in time to see you leave Your car pulling out of my driveway Maybe next time... I..."

"I still remember the conversation we had in Arizona You were drunk and high, I was just high Both of us trying to hide it You gave yourself away when you went to sit on the chair And ended up on the f..."

"As I sit on my front porch At dawn watching... The glowing, red, sun shining upon me From a distance... My head fogged... From the the sleepless night before The air Crisp and cool like... Mother Nat..."

"You hold me close... But, I am ignorant of your warmth I know only that I don't want human contact today... It burns my skin You whisper, "I love you, do you love me too?" Only to be disappointed by ..."

"Empty days Empty nights Seems like yesterday We were discussing our plans For flight... I didn't know then I don't know now We were standing in a circle Roads stemming outwards Trying to decide wh..."

"I'm having trouble... Walking around on this S H A K I N G Ground... I thought I could handle... This much freedom I can do what I want When I want... Great! I will have so much fun Wasting this t..."

"Exhausted by the everyday battles I still have far to go... Drowning in the distance I may be going nowhere But, I'm staggering there so slow... I'm waiting to take control Choking on contradictions..."

"Clawing my way through the wall Everyday to reach the other side So I can make sure the grass is Greener there... The light shines brightest During the night Following the northern star To find my w..."

"The moon has come full circle above Stirring the blood in everyone As the plastic half circle spreads across my face To indicate I'm listening and understand Halfway, I rummage through past scenes Sep..."

"When you just can’t stand to be around people anymore When you just can’t seem to scream loud enough When none of the thoughts make sense anymore When all the important thoughts conflict When you’re a..."

"The dormant thought lying in its hard shell Succumbing to the pressure Cracking, branching down like lightning Awaken the sleeping giant Slowly leaking out like honey Invading, permeating the crevices..."

"Fear burgeons black budsLike death, it growsTo bring a dark pallOver the mind's viewLiving with fear feels more like dying...But, I doMaybe there'll come a dayWhen distortions break clearI can swing m..."

"The slivers slide past the foreign objectsIn the small bowl, this moldPolished and clean for these untouched objectsQuickly intertwining, wrapping a mistFalling to be shapedTime flows until it rises u..."

"I'm starving, I'm weak I'm tired, but I still have so far to goI'm going nowhereBut, I'm going there so slowI'll be content when I finally reach my destinationWhen, I can lie and restOh, To Sleep!To f..."

"What I wouldn't give To spin verses with pithTo protrude like a knife InsideThe mind's Manifestation of a soulBe possessed With a fecundity To leave ones mind laden With wonderings of whyA bundle of w..."

"The ice is forming around this heart of mineAs I go through the motions with great precisionI wouldn’t feel the rays on my back if the sun chose to shineBut, watch as all the people who have made the ..."

"A strange season Winter and warm Put out the logs Lit prematurely Awake sweaty and Too weak to throw Blankets to the floor Take a walk Temperature rising Inside a turtleneck Watching men in shorts W..."

"Ignorance creates serenity As it breeds inside the skull Delusion of Utopia follows Ambition drains As potential is robbed Knowledge starved mind Withers to insufficiency Locked in a box Written Decem..."

"The latency roared Through cacophony Mauling obstacles Breaking up straight lines Lessons with punishment The beaten realize Finding resolution For defiant attack Life possesses a possibility O..."

"Chemical laden depression Lies awake always Gathering memories Recording events Assembling their Distortions Storing to use As arms during Great restitution Written December 17th, 2001 © on Dec 17..."

"They are Sad and fat They feel Weak and helpless Against fate They worry Yet do nothing They think Getting high... Is a tragedy They lie awake At night Anxious About tomorrow Replaying Stupid..."

"Through blue veins Cleansed quickly Sharply and often Life serum pushes It's way All the way Through Any buildup Without delay I wish the inner workings Reflected the outer Written December 18th, 2..."

"The building on the hill Sterile sheets and paintings Of children in hats Like the patients With bald heads The hair left before To prepare a place For them when they reunite Everyone who checks in ..."

"Life split into two realities The ground bursts with energy In form of green blooms Flowers with hues Too many to name Children run madly Intoxicated with youth Discoveries to be found Everyday insi..."

"Absorbing karma Destroying circumstance Slaying ridicule With Nazi chant Overcome residue Of Lies Scream truth Layered with guilt Fault finding Failures heal Glints of light Reflects off gems Writt..."

"Awakened Rise to the day Swallow the Prozac Help along the way Eat salads No red meat Blend in homogeneous mixture Make it feel okay Or we will drain you out Draining... Continue forward No, we can'..."

"Soft, pink flesh parts Revealing gleaming, marble daggers Spurting venom Into the distant innocent Cloaked and veiled in hate Now screaming blood Everyone's staring now To watch the scene Then they ..."

"I want to plan I want to believe In hope It's easier to leave Than cope I want... I want... I want... But, what? I don't know It's difficult to pause For my mind to swagger through The madness and..."

"Listen to music The way businessmen Listen to stock reports Read poetry The way old women Read the obituaries Written January 20th, 2002 © on Jan 19 2002 04:57 PM PST   0 • 10"

"Sifting though Shards of glass Studying broken reflections Unaware of answers Screaming life and health Bleeding out my hands Written January 20th, 2002 © on Jan 19 2002 04:59 PM PST   0 • 10"

"I mourn mental illness When my head floated Above my shoulders Where a cold,damp corner Could always be found On a dry, sunny day Squinting through new eyes I tiptoe along the edge Written January 20t..."

"In this dismal one room house The windows are covered with leaves Where everyone left Now, I can't see out Parasites slide up and down The walls and onto and into me Taking the little I have left I'd..."

"It's every single time That it happens again Once again And it's my own fault And my own stupidity And I try to learn From my mistakes But, wait there I go again And Again... Again... I build my ho..."

"The moon glowing Bright as a feline's eyes Which reflect the fallen star Supine, but radiating Black magic Provoking the helots' Blood to mad vortex The serfs run helterskelter Under the unconscienab..."

"I held on so tight My hands went numb And, I couldn't feel You slipping away Now I gaze over the plains The sky, the only thing Obstructing my view Of things more distant No life to be seen I wrap ..."