WhiteMidnight

"Sitting h e r e l a t e nights S  a  d o v e r m    y latest strife I need Y o u                                   Now m o r e  t h a n  e v e r                                 I guess that you wil..."

"A good life's been wasted A fine soul left out to dry Get me out of this hell hole Before I have to die I'm sitting here alone Biding my time Bored to the bone Writing a rhyme While my heart gently ..."

"Her again? I thought she was gone But I guess my love just goes on I thought she was out of my mind I guess she'll be staying for a while I keep thinking about her beautiful smile I've had a close en..."

"Her eyes were as green as emeralds, Her lips were rubies and more A smile that sparkled like diamonds Her head was a jewelry store!Hey, I told ya it was short... Written November 11th, 2001 © on Nov ..."

"The steak was as tough as leather, The chicken smelled like a zoo The potatoes were a day of bad weather, The veggies tasted like shoe. Dessert had the texture of highway, The milk was a tall glass of..."

"What's that feeling in my tummy? Did it come from the beans that were so yummy? I hate to say it but I must confess I went and took a pill - Gas-X Supposedly it stops the gas From getting into one gr..."

"Could this day get any better? I am wet, you are wetter Sitting together in the bath Telling jokes, enjoying a laugh I pull my lips close to you I see you do it too We're getting closer, we're almost ..."

"I'm not cautious, rather uncareful As was evident nine months ago The doctor told me I was fertile What that meant, I did not know I found out my girlfriend was pregnant I couldn't believe it was tru..."

"My body feels like a hurricane, My head aches like a bitch But my mouth is numb - thanks novacaine You will not see a twitch. It started, you see, a few months prior To my dental cleaning I was playi..."

"Our daughter is all grown now, And we've had some funny times Like the day she went to the basement And drank 2 bottles of wine My wife and I, one time Had an arguement over something funny She wante..."

"You can boil, you can fry, serving that cake and some pie. Fill that cone with ice cream, diggin' the Diner Queen. Friday night and the lights are low People looking for dinner to go Where they serve..."

"I needed a haircut - I'd try a new guy, maybe The barber talked real funny - he sounded like a baby "How would you like it cut," he asked, "spiked or maybe flat?" I told him spiked sounded great and t..."

"With apologies to the Beatles... ------- Let me tell you how it will be There's one for you, thousands for me 'Cause I'm bin Ladin, yeah, I'm bin Ladin Should three plane crashes be too small Be t..."

"With apologies to the Beatles... ------ They are called the Taliban, Causing havoc where they can, Nobody quite understands just why. They’ve a screwed up point of view, Know just what they’re gon..."

"I have so many "pet" names for her it isn't even funny And when I call her "sweetie" she hops to me like a bunny She loves to go out with me, we do so every night When I scare her she "barks" at me, b..."

"I'm hungry but we have nothing to eat Not a slice of cheese or a pice of meat Our phones are dead so I can't take out But perhaps this will cure my gout I can't cook, my parents aren't home So maybe I..."

"I'm going crazy over here, man, can't you see? I'm being driven up a wall by my fuckin' PC I used to yell stupid things like "Why you little turd!" Or say "Man, you suck big monkey balls!" at Microsof..."

"This is written for George Harrison. It makes many references to John Lennon as well...but it fit well. Sung to the tune of American Pie. Enjoy, and God bless George Harrison's soul. A long, long ti..."

"There weren't any bathrooms on I-95 I had to piss so badly that I wanted to cry Holding it didn't help when it began to rain Even listening to the radio didn't ease my pain I was going crazy, so I fou..."

"I didn't gain any weight last night, So why are my pants getting tight? I think, although, I may be wrong, That it's due to someone's thong When they wear their pants real low, My you-know-what does s..."

"Winds, tornadoes, hurricanes Thunderstorms, torrential rains Yes, I know they are a pain But they are all weather Some may, indeed, kill many, Others' damage may be plenty Gentle enough, some may be,..."

"To the tune of "Video Killed the Radio Star"... ________________________________________________ I used to see cheers on the Arsenio Hall Show I used to think to myself "This show really blows".  E..."

"I stayed up hours last night, making a nice long list I looked over it again, making sure that nothing was missed My parents took me to the mall, where I saw Mr. Claus When he saw the chain on my neck..."

"Tonight is a time to start anew A new leaf for the year two-thousand and two Expressing the joy around the world Is different for many boys and girls In Spanish-speaking countries, I tohught you shoul..."

"I looked at you adoringly, Gazing into your beautiful eyes I so wanted to tell you I loved you, But the words escaped me. You fell asleep in my arms that night, My hands around you as if you were a pl..."

"I'm a big guy, 280 pounds to be exact When my sister was missing my mind went whack I was playing in the street, with her as the ball She was tossed a bit too hard and we both hit the wall That knocke..."

"Following in everyone else's path...friend acronyms and whatnot. All girls, stupid me (lol) Just a bit shorter than me Actually, a lot shorter than me Christ, how is she so short? Keeps under 5 feet ..."

"Hey everyone, Jackie forced me to write a poem for her. Here goes... There once was a girl from Nantucket... Juuuuuuuuust kidding, here's the real thing... So there's this girl who plays the flute..."

"Having nothing else to eat, this lifeless form of meat Almost looked good. But the closer it got to my mouth, the more My stomach churned. The way I saw it, this was a Battle - survival of the fittest..."

"What's that smell that's oh-so-tart? Oh no, oh dear, it's foreign fart! My nose is running, my eyes are burning My head is pounding, my stomach churning Why could this guy not hold it in? Why'd he com..."

"I didn't know you, but already I wanted to say it - those three little words. I'd never uttered anything to you before, but I was ready to speak the unspeakable. I watched you from afar, I waned to sp..."

"I couldn't believe my eyes - flowing streams of milk, chunks of chocolate falling from the heavens like hail, and graham craker boats. On the other side of the stream of 2 percent milk was a giant flu..."

""Shit!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. "Ass," Shandra Kopel, my assistant and wife, said, "Don't attempt to say that word anymore." "My love," I said, "I was esentially describing what was coming..."

"I watched you descending down The stairs of the school in our town This was the first my eyes had seen Of you, so beautiful and lean As tou went down these stairs I was free - no worries, no cares Lik..."

"Hello, agent 000, this is Dick Cheney speaking My torso's getting cramped up and my legs are weak'ning If this goes on any longer, I'll be in the creamatorium Oh wait - I forgot! - my battery is nicke..."

"1) I could not believe it when I met you - you were so 2) Beautiful and smart. Most like you are very 3) Stupid, arrogant, dull, lame - any way you look at it, 4) You weren't. I figured I'd tell you t..."

"Her and I got it on, she said she liked it from behind I was willing to try something new, I certainly didn't mind Her pants pulled down to her waist, my abs against her back She yelled "That's eno..."

"I love to hear the Star Spangled Banner, the pop of the ball in the catcher’s mitt and the roar of the crowd, to smell the aroma of hot popcorn, peanuts, and Cracker Jack, to stare at the ..."